What are grandparents for? In our era, when the miracle of medical scientific advances has brought longevity increasingly to be a norm in society, children are often in receipt of the blessing of knowing not only their grandparents but also their great-grandparents. We may we ask the question, what are grandparents for? Here is the distillation of ten points on the subject in a paper that a Google search provided:
A grandparent provides unconditional love, support, encouragement and fun. A grandparent is a link to family history and traditions, supporting parents, giving education and new experience, acting as a role model, teaching values and conveying wisdom;
https://discussion.roadscholar.org/b/blog/posts/what-are-grandparents-for
What would the Jewish view on this be? An idea arising from sedra Mishpatim articulates Judaism’s idea of the special educational role that grandparents have to play. Ess mispar yomecho amaley “The number of your days I will fill” (Shemos 23;26)
The promise that G-d “will fill the number of your days” is explained by classic commentator Seforno: When a person merits to live to a ripe old age, he generally has the opportunity of seeing his children’s children. He therefore has the opportunity to teach them. The young generation, who are blessed with grandparents, consequently have the benefit of a double measure of educational input. Not only do they receive guidance from their parents, but also from their grandparents. In Seforno’s words (translated from the Hebrew original):
“And behold, when there are filled for a person the number of their days, he will generally get to see grandchildren, and he will be able to teach them – in accordance with the Torah command (Devarim 4;9) You shall inform them to our children and to your children’s children. And there will become strengthened and repaired, through the lives of the elderly the matters of the generations, as is recounted concerning Levi, Kehos and Amram.
The lives of the elderly ‘strengthens and repairs the matters of the generations’ is the memorable way that Seforno puts the educational contribution that grandparents can make to their grandchildren.
But what is that reference to Moshe’s ancestors, Levi, Kehos and Amram, Moshe’s great grandfather, grandfather and father respectively? Seforno’s reference here is to a comment he offers earlier in Shemos where the Chumash lists the tribes Reuven, Shimon and Levi, providing the genealogical backgrounds for Moshe and Aharon as they go off on the mission of leading the Jewish people in the Exodus:
Moshe and Aharon were quite justifiably appointed leaders of the Jewish people, for they were the most distinguished of all the nation. For Reuven as firstborn did not have descendants who were worthy of these roles, neither Shimon. But Levi, since he lived the longest of them all, was able to educate his grandsons to wisdom and understanding, likewise [Levi’s son] Kehos and Amram, (respectively Moshe’s grandfather and father) in such a manner that there emerged from them the three distinguished personalities, Aharon, Moshe and Miriam.
A most powerful suggestion is presented here: grandparents, if they become the teachers of their grandchildren, ensure that their grandchildren receive the ‘booster power-pack’ of a doubly education. That’s how our leaders Moshe and Aharon emerged – because they were unique recipients of that powerful double boost of parents and grandparents. This the role and agenda mapped out for grandparents; the providers of their grandchildren with the double best start in life.
It is a Jewish blessing to wish people long life. In the Rosh Chodesh Bentsching we pray to be granted long life, vesiten lonu chayim aruchim. The Divine promise of length of days offers the opportunity to the senior generation to fulfil a real purpose in society – to provide, by their example and inspiration, a great measure of guidance to a young generation.
Shabbat Shalom, Good Shabbos to all,
Rabbi Jonathan Guttentag