The story is told of an arrogant, conceited, and brazen rich man who over the year had given much grief to the tzaddik Rav Boruch Medzbizher. When Erev Yom Kippur arrived he turned up to beg forgiveness from the Rebbe. “You know” he audaciously began, “I don’t really want to make up with you, but what can I do, Halachah dictates that before Yom Kippur one must make up with those who one has insulted and hurt!” Instead of a contrite and broken heart this Jew was taking chutzpah to a new level. The holy Rebbe shrewdly answered him – paraphrasing the words we say tonight at Kol Nidrei, “Solachti Kid’vorecha” – “I forgive you [but only] according to your words”.
Today many Jews around the world will be asking for forgiveness from people they may have offended during the year. But if we are just going through the motions because that is what the Halachah dictates then we must remember that the pardoning will only ever, “kid’vorecha” – as much as our words are seriously meant and emanate from the heart. Ultimately our begging for atonement from Hashem over the next day will be greeted with Hashem’s response, “I forgive you [but only] according to your words”.
This expression is taken from after the sin of the spies. Moshe pleads with Hashem not to wipe out the Jews in one swoop, and Hashem in granting a pardoning, set in motion the mechanics for ever after. The atonement that Moshe achieved for the sin of the spies was incomplete, it was only “kid’vorecha”. Yes, the Jews would not be killed in one go, but over the next thirty eight years an entire generation would die in the desert. Had Moshe dug deeper the results could have been better for us. But we down here create our own reality up there – in our relationship with the Al-Mighty.
We read last Shabbos a verse that describes this very phenomenon. “For Hashem’s portion (“chelek”) is His people, Yaakov is the measure (“chevel”) of His inheritance”. What exactly does it mean “Hashem’s portion is His people”? The Sifsei Chaim suggests that “chelek” in this context means a partnership. We have a business deal with Hashem where what we do affects what He does. Based on what we do down here will affect up there in the higher realms. Reb Chaim Volozhin [1749-1821] famously explained the end of the verse using a parable of a string that is held in a hand which extends all the way into heaven. A small tug down here pulls certain things up in heaven. Exactly corresponding to the type of tug will be the reaction in heaven. A “chevel” is actually a rope, and so the verse can now read, “a rope connects us and makes us part of His inheritance”. It is in our hands to decide on what reaction we want to create up in heaven.
This powerful and mind-blowing idea is where the primeval snake had it right! When the snake said that man could become like G-d Himself, he was entirely right. In what way would man become like G-d? Man could become, “A creator of worlds” says the Medresh. This is the power that is in our hands – we can literally tug the string down here and create a reality that is up in heaven. In turn that reality will come down to us. If we dig deep within ourselves when we approach Hashem and ask for forgiveness this will create the forgiveness “kid’vorecha” – according to OUR words.
A couple of weeks ago we read, “for this Mitzvah that I command you today – it is not hidden from you and it is not distant. It is not in heaven, for you to say, “who can ascend to the heaven for us and take it for us so that we can listen to it and perform it? Nor is it…… rather the matter is very near to you – in your mouth and in your heart – to perform it”.
The Mitzvah of the verse is referring to the Mitzvah of Teshuva – repenting, or more accurately ‘returning’ to Hashem. As we stand today on the tenth and final day of the ten days of ‘Teshuvah’ we must understand that which we are told that it is not in heaven.
One may have thought that to fulfil the Mitzvah of Teshuva one must ascend to heaven. We know that all our actions have ramifications in the higher realms – as we have already explained. The prospect of doing Teshuva for a wrong ‘tug’ on the line that created a reality up in heaven might seem awfully daunting. How do we repair worlds that we have created up in heaven? Worlds that now feed back down to us a reality that we wish we could delete. To this the verse tells us that Teshuva should not be seen as being ‘up in heaven’. We need to just pull our side of the string and the rest will follow.
But we must remember that the flow will be dictated “kid’vorecha” – according to the sincerity of our words. We are in the driving seat to make changes up in heaven!
Let me finish with a thought from the Chidoh [1724-1806] which gives us a glimpse into the connecting strings that there are between us and heaven. Sometimes we can get a feel as to what repercussions are taking place in heaven as reactions to our actions here on earth. He writes, “according to how a man behaves towards Hashem so too his spouse behaves towards him”. If one’s spouse gives him the cold shoulder – this is a reflection of how Hashem is feeling towards him. He writes, “if one’s wife refuses to listen to him, don’t be upset with her for he has caused his own downfall!” In other words, the way one’s spouse behaves towards him may well be a tug on the line from Hashem. That tug is really just the ripple effect from the tug you gave down here!
Good Shabbos, Good Yom Tov,
Yaakov